what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
