Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
