Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
