He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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