Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
3pm strippers are depressing
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
third nipple confirmed
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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