We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
