It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
