Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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