I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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