Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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