I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Randomize
