I must be too annoying 4 u.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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