i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
