chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
