Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
