i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
