I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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