Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
