Whod you bang
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
