is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
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