nutella sex= disaster
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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