Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Text me some of your sweat
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