Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
