Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
