Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Randomize
