If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
