I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
