It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
