I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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