She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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