I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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