I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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