whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
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