i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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