My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
