I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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