so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize