SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
