Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
When did angry sex become our thing?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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