rhymes with "ouble enetration"
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
