Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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