It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
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