Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
