Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
