Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Randomize
