we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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