So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
