He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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