Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I am mentally ready for anal.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
