so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
